Posted in etcetera

swine flu over the cuckoo’s nest

Status update: I didn’t get the job that I interviewed for. I’m not surprised. At least they told me. :shrug:

In other news, I’ve been sick yet again, and it started around the time we were having a local outbreak of swine flu. This concerned me – I may be falling back into my hypochondriac ways – so to comfort myself, I made a list of the

Top Five Reasons I Know I Have an Allergy Attack, Not Swine Flu

5. Before becoming sick, I hadn’t been out in public for over a week.
4. I *had* been out in the yard for hours two days in a row, during high pollen count days.
3. Classic signs of seasonal allergies: sneezing, watery eyes, sinus pressure, a bit of skin rash
2. No “high fever that doesn’t respond to Tylenol”
1. I’m a vegetarian!

I was amused a few days later when I received this from my cousin:

Top 10 Signs You Have Swine Flu

10. You can’t pass a mud puddle without wanting to roll in it
9. Even though it’s hot outside, you don’t sweat
8. *cough, cough*  *oink, oink*
7. You can smell food five miles away
6. You have the urge to push things with your nose
5. Your Jewish friends have shunned you
4. The smell of bacon is appalling
3. Your new favorite story is “Three Little Pigs”
2. The site of a BBQ grill makes you nervous
1. You now think Miss Piggy is a supermodel

Thanks, cousin, that makes me feel better. Except maybe for number ten. 😀

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